We’re in a time of transition: Here are 20 things to help you be more resilient.

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Photo by Gift Habeshaw on Unsplash

With all the world's uncertainty right now, many people are experiencing the ups and downs of adapting to new ways of living. I’ve had a few emotional dips recently, and given that I’m generally an upbeat person, I was puzzled why.

Things made more sense when I remembered the research done by William Bridges, author of Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes. He explains change is external (moving from one city to another, for example), but transition or adaptation to change is an internal, psychological process.

He describes three non-linear phases of transition: endings, neutral zone, and new beginnings. Endings occur with significant changes in relationships, employment, home life, finances, lifestyle, and inner being. The neutral zone is a place of emptiness, a kind of no-man’s-land — endings are not fully resolved, and the future not clear. New beginnings are characterized by embracing new possibilities, acceptance, and adapting willingly. …


Ten principles to help you lead a happier and more meaningful life during the apocalypse.

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photo by prottoy-hassan-Unsplash

We need to find our strength, courage, and fulfillment from within more than ever. Real contentment is not, and never has been, a result of other people, places, and things. It’s within us, and there are practical ways to experience it.

Nothing I’m saying is new or complicated. It all starts by being curious — wanting to know your inner world, what makes you tick, what makes you conscious.

Being conscious means to be awake, to be aware of one’s inner and outer worlds. …


Things are looking better, but I’m still not moving back

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Photo by Luke Stackpoole on Unsplash

I’m an American living in Scotland for the past 18 months. I left the concrete-filled, traffic-jammed, farmland turned shopping mall Philadelphia suburbs and now live in northeast Scotland in a seacoast village of 3,000 people, just outside of Scotland's third-largest city, Dundee. For those that don’t know, Scotland is as far north as Norway. It doesn’t really snow in the winter and rarely gets below freezing. There’s plenty of sunshine and decent weather, despite what you might hear.

Most everyone in my town says hello to each other on the street. The air is clean. There are no billboards. There are wind turbines everywhere. Recycling is almost a religious experience. The target date for net-zero emissions of all greenhouse gases is by 2045. We actually know most of our neighbors. I can walk to and play on the 13th oldest golf course in the world. I don’t worry about getting shot if I cut someone off inadvertently while learning to drive on the left side of the road. …


Humans 101

Focus on what you can control — your attitude and your behavior

Many multi-colored balloons in the dark sky.
Many multi-colored balloons in the dark sky.
Photo: Tawan Chaisom/EyeEm/Getty Images

We live as if we are fully in control of our life. It’s a normal thing to do until something like the pandemic shows up, which, like anything unexpected, reminds us that we’re not in control as much as we might like to believe.

If Viktor Frankl were still alive, I bet he’d be smiling every time someone quotes him these days.

Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” — Viktor Frankl

Since we’ve all been administered the “stimulus,” how we respond is the big question. If we want growth and freedom, we need to realize that there are only two things in our control: our attitude and our behavior. We have the ability to make wise choices about both. …


Humans 101

Don’t wrestle with pigs and don’t die on every hill

Illustration of a hand held out in a fist and an open hand extended toward it.
Illustration of a hand held out in a fist and an open hand extended toward it.
Image: Malte Mueller/Getty Images

Given the political, social, and economic climate right now, tension and conflict are apt to surface more than ever.

People under stress are more likely to display a “bad day” version of themselves. Emotions close to the surface are easily triggered. When someone is stressed, angry, or irritated, they are less rational and empathetic — making the ability to resolve differences even more important.

What really matters in a difficult situation is how conscious and skilled you are. My former colleague and author of the bestselling book Conscious Business, Fred Kofman, says: “There are no difficult conflicts. …


Humans 101

First, you must know yourself

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Image: anand purohit/Getty Images

Our lives are not what they used to be. The pressures on many of us continue to mount, and it’s more important than ever to take responsibility for managing our well-being.

In the face of these challenges, we need to find ways to live peacefully on our journey toward inner satisfaction, purpose, and meaning. Here are 10 practices that have helped me — and may help you — live a more peaceful and fulfilling life.

1. Find your inner strength

We all have routines, rituals, or practices that help us focus. The most important thing I’ve ever done is to find a practical way to minimize the self-talk in my head and connect to my inner power. …


Humans 101

The everyday martial art of talking to someone who disagrees with you

A blue silhouette of a bald person overlapping a red silhouette of a long-haired person, all on a yellow background.
A blue silhouette of a bald person overlapping a red silhouette of a long-haired person, all on a yellow background.
Credit: tomozina/iStock/Getty Images Plus

Words create our reality. Once we put them out there, we can’t take them back. Expressions like “I didn’t mean to say that” or “I was only kidding” come too late.

So why do couples get into needless arguments? Jeffery S. Smith, MD, writes in Psychology Today:

The cause of arguments and fights is a lack of mutual, empathic understanding. When empathy is not engaged, then people revert to a self-protective mode and become judgmental. The result is a bad feeling on both sides and no happy ending.

People want to be understood, not just heard.

Author Daniel Kahneman’s theory of two different systems of thinking sheds light on why we sometimes lose the ability to be empathetic in our relationships. …


Humans 101

Five ways to get unstuck and reclaim your mojo

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Photo: Anh Nguyen/Unsplash

It’s easy to feel down these days, especially with the pandemic looming over us with no clear end in sight.

I’ve had bouts of situational depression brought on by deaths, breakups, job loss, and divorce. Like most people, I’ve gone through what psychiatrist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross deemed the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

And, like many people, I had times where I wallowed in depression longer than necessary — soaking in it like warm bathwater. I invented good reasons to linger in the negativity. …


Planet Soul

Meditation can help you locate your truest self

Abstract illustration of person balancing on ball and juggling at the same time.
Abstract illustration of person balancing on ball and juggling at the same time.
Illustration: Sharon Kane/Getty Images

There is nothing better than being in a loving, peaceful relationship with your spouse or partner — and nothing worse than being stuck in a relationship prone to tension and contempt. But to build a great relationship with someone else, you need to have a healthy relationship with yourself first.

Imagine you’ve just finished a wonderful meal and are relaxing by candlelight in your favorite spot, enjoying a piece of chocolate with your partner. It feels so good you almost don’t notice it. You experience an absence of wanting anything else. You feel whole without the need for more. …


Lived Through This

The road back to my Self was paved with sex, love, guns, and motorcycles

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Photo: Free To Use Sounds/Unsplash

I never intended to join a cult when I was younger. But I did. Getting in that deep wasn’t my original intent — I simply wanted to understand more about a 16-year-old Indian boy I’d learned of. He was known at the time as “Guru Maharaji,” but now he’s known as Prem Rawat.

Young Rawat spoke of creating world peace one person at a time. He was charming and attracted thousands of young people drawn to him and the experience he described, so I learned how to practice his meditation.

He is the youngest son of a guru from Northern India, having a vision when his father died to take their teachings to the world. A persuasive speaker at eight years old, he began addressing crowds of hundreds of thousands in India with a core message that has remained remarkably the same over the past 50 years: “There is peace within, and I can help you experience it.” …

About

Don Johnson

Writer | Executive Coach | Relationship Coach | Mindfulness Warrior| don@integriagroup.com | www.integriagroup.com |

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